crazy, weird, UNIQUE!

I realize…

I realize more and more the older I get that there are things in this life that just aren’t worth my time.  I don’t care if people talk about me in a negative way.  It doesn’t make me think badly of myself–only why in the world would they waste their time talking about me?  And what is wrong with THEM? Haha!  I’m like “Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhht?”

I realize more and more, as the number of candles on my cake increases, that things of this world are so temporary.  I have been quite a hoarder most my life (and believe it’s an essential part of my job sometimes–art teachers hoard crazy stuff to make art out of), but as I go through some items I kept through my youth, I think WHY DID I KEEP THAT!?!  Why do I have this napkin or this deflated balloon or even a note from someone I don’t even recall?  Haha!  Again, “Whaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhht?”

I realize more and more, as the days, months and years pass by that people come and go, but true friends really stay no matter whether they live in your town or move far, far way.  Those that you lose touch with or that lose touch with you–whichever, I’m not trying to point fingers–have completed their “assigned task” in your life.  There’s no “Whaaaaaaht?” on this one–that is just truth.

I realize more and more, as the sands through the hour glass trickle down (reminds me of an old soap opera my mom used to watch), I’m a product more of my attitude than anything or anyone in this life.  My attitude is what keeps me looking forward.  I know that God has blessed me and I keep that at the front of my head.

I realize more and more that as time goes by…I’m different…I’m a transformed person…I’m a smarter, new and improved me. I’m almost nothing like I was when I was during my junky year of 6th grade, my celebratory year as a senior in high school, my scary yet exciting first year as a teacher, those firsts as a wife, mother, etc.  Sure I have the same face with a few more wrinkles and I still have some of the same habits such as good dental hygiene, but I’m different.

I realize more and more that I’m a creation of the God Almighty and He is the reason I’m even realizing anything!  He is the reason I can have hope for tomorrow, hope for my children and excitement in this life at all.  I’m so glad I realize this.  I’m so glad I’m no longer lost, worried or down on myself.   Sure, I get a little crazy when life does, but I always have GOD to hold my hand and help me turn my eyes to Him.  I realize, because I have Him.   I realize…


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